How to ask your girlfriend to marry you
Here's a modern girl's take on the tradition: how to ask her dad for his blessing — in a way that's right for HER. As love has become more important to marriage than money and joining families, the traditions have changed too. Some people argue that asking her father for permission is sexist, chauvinist, and recalls a time when women were treated like property. Some people say a father should have nothing to do with adult relationships. Having a conversation about marriage with her dad, or other important family member, is an important tradition, a rite of passage, and a bonding experience between you and your future father-in-law. Bonus points if you also include her mom in this conversation.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Asking My Girlfriend to Marry Me
SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: 10 Tips For The Perfect Proposal - How To Pop The Question In StyleContent:
- Before Asking Her to Marry You, Do This
- 15 questions you must ask your girlfriend before proposing
- The Best of Hong Kong
- 38 Romantic Ways to Propose, According to Real Couples
- 26 Signs You Should Propose ASAP
- How To Propose To A Girl
- How To Propose To Her
- The 66 Most Romantic Ways to Propose
- Asking Her Dad For Permission To Marry Her Is So 1917
Before Asking Her to Marry You, Do This
Updated: February 23, Reader-Approved References. So you've found the woman you want to spend the rest of your life with. How do you ask her to be yours -- forever?
You should push your nervousness aside and remember that, once you have a full plan and know what to expect, you'll be able to propose to your girlfriend without any blunders at any stage. You don't have to do anything over-the-top or crazy, unless you think that's what she wants and its what you want.
Make that grand gesture if you want to and think she will appreciate it. The most important thing is that you speak from the heart, and that you find the perfect way to let her know how much she means to you. Remember, you may wish to, or have to, ask her parents if you can marry her first, otherwise they will not be happy with you and buying an engagement ring might be useful.
Proposing marriage is a big step, get started at step one below. To propose to a woman, start by choosing somewhere romantic to pop the question, like one of her favorite destinations or a spot with a scenic view.
Then, decide how you want to propose to her. If you want to have a traditional proposal, bend down on one knee, show her a ring, and ask "Will you marry me? To learn how to decide when the right time to propose is, keep reading! Did this summary help you? Yes No. Log in Facebook.
Together, they cited 11 references. This article has over 2,, views, and 24 testimonials from our readers, earning it our reader-approved status. Learn more Tips and Warnings. Things You'll Need. Related Articles. Article Summary. Ensure that she's the one. You've probably already been thinking this over for some time. The important thing is to know that you love her and consider her to be "the one".
Write down or think through a list of all the reasons that make you want to marry her. This will be important for expressing your love to her at the proposal, as well as confirming to yourself that you're making the right decision. When you see your girlfriend, you should feel that you absolutely want to share the rest of your life with her, and that the time is right for you to tell her that. The important thing is that you propose because you genuinely want to, not because she's dropped so many hints about getting married that you don't want to disappoint her, not because you feel like you've been together long enough and that it's just about time for you to do something, not because everyone around you is getting engaged, and definitely not because your friends, pastor, and family members keep putting the pressure on for you to propose.
Many people believe that you should move in with your girlfriend for at least a few months before you know she's the one. You may like her at a distance, but once you have to share a bed, groceries, and some mutual expenses, you may see an entirely different side of each other that isn't as compatible as you believed. Of course, you don't have to do this, but it's one way of "double checking" that you can really see yourself spending the rest of your life with her.
It can help to talk this through with a close friend or family member, as long as you're sure that person won't spill your secret. Avoid discussing your plans too widely with others, as it can soon filter back to her through the grapevine.
Be confident with your relationship. See if she's dropped hints that she wants to get married to you , that she wants to move in to a house with you, to have kids, to make you a part of her family, and so on.
If she's never mentioned these things, then you can try out some feeler conversations to get a sense of her feelings; if she acts uncomfortable or deflects your questions, then she may not be ready to get married. If you've only been together for a few months, make sure you know that she's in it for the long haul. Though many happily married couples got engaged after being together for only a few months, spending more time with your girlfriend to make sure that you're both the right people for each other can help you make sure she'll say yes.
Though you may be nervous about figuring out her feelings if you're not sure, this can save you from embarrassing yourself during a proposal, when you should have figured out she wasn't ready. Consider asking her parents permission. If her parents are old-fashioned, and your significant other wouldn't mind, you could consider asking her parents for for their daughter's hand in marriage.
Although asking a father's permission is considered by many to be old-fashioned, it hasn't died out precisely because it's a gesture that suggests that you respect her and her family and that you're always going to be considerate of her family. It's also a sign of politeness, and what family can resist that?
But again, it really depends on the girl and her family situation, so try to feel it out. Or is it something that might make her cringe? Or maybe she is estranged from her family. Take your cues from your knowledge of her existing situation and preferences.
You should know her well enough by now. Another modern twist on asking for permission is to do so after you've proposed. This can be a way of ensuring that your wife-to-be is the first to be asked but she's aware that you still intend to bring her family right into the fold by asking; this can also be a good excuse to turn up together to share the news.
Some people consider that this is the "wrong way around" but it's still a sign of respect, and frankly, it's your choice. If it isn't possible to ask her father , ask her mother.
Decide when to propose. It's important to get the timing right, and timing is really only something that you can work out. It's not possible to say that there are perfect times to propose, but it is important that you propose at a time when you're not rushed and when you feel calm, sorted, and ready. Once you've planned the proposal in as much detail as possible, then the time will be right. Such as an anniversary of your relationship or first date, or some other commemoration?
Sometimes the time chooses itself by sheer practicality, especially if the two of you are living in different cities and come together for a special holiday event and this is your only chance to ask her.
It's helpful to ask her or indirectly through her friends or family if there is a certain season, month, or length of time she wants to be engaged in order to plan the wedding without feeling overwhelmed or rushed. If she's mentioned that she wants a fall wedding, try proposing around that time the year before -- if you propose just a few months before the fall and she wants a bigger fall wedding, she may not like the idea of waiting well over a year to get married.
Proposing on special holidays or birthdays has advantages and drawbacks. On the one hand, these days can make the occasion more meaningful, especially if family is gathered around or it's a time of great joy. On the other hand, you will always share your proposal date with the holiday date; if you want to celebrate your engagement date, this can make it feel less impersonal for some, while for others, it's a great way to remember!
If you plan on proposing to her on Thanksgiving with your families nearby, for example, make sure you take her out on a long walk or somewhere private when you do it, before you get overwhelmed by family and don't have a minute to yourselves to process what just happened. Decide where you will propose. The place and atmosphere of the proposal will be remembered forever and the most important thing to remember is that you are the principal creator of the atmosphere!
Naturally, you can propose absolutely anywhere, but it helps to choose a place that will be meaningful for both of you and where you can feel comfortable, calm, and natural. Does she love the beach, sunsets, tall buildings, bridges, cityscapes, nature , etc.?
Or maybe she'd prefer a private screening at the local cinema? Consider how you will propose. Once you've decided the when and the where, the intimate details of the how need consideration.
Naturally, there is the ring to produce, but what other elements do you want to add into the mix to make this an especially memorable and romantic occasion for her? Bear in mind that the manner in which you propose will be retold by her many times over, so make sure it's good! There are many possibilities and it's entirely up to you what you do but for some inspiration, here are some suggestions  X Research source : Try the traditional pose. Bend down on one knee, take her hand in yours and ask her to marry you.
The beauty of this gesture is that it's universally recognized thanks to the movies, and it can be performed anywhere. Just note that if there are other people around, they'll be eavesdropping kindly! Choose a ring. If you know what kind of ring your girlfriend wants, then great. But if you don't know or don't want to ask, get a temporary ring, and then get another after you propose; for many women, choosing their own ring is the preferred option.
But if you know exactly what kind of ring she wants, then you should try to sneak out a ring she usually wears to get it sized and to find out her ring size. She'll be touched that you remembered exactly what she wanted -- and that you got it in the correct size! But if you have no idea what kind of ring she wants, asking her about it "casually" will pretty much let her know what's on your mind. It's better to get something small and classy and to save for your future together instead of spending all your savings on a piece of jewelry.
If budget is a concern, consider all types of natural diamonds. The diamond industry now offers many types that fit within everyone's price range including clarity enhanced, laser drilled, and natural GIA certified HPHT diamonds. Read How to choose an engagement ring for more information. Be well dressed. Dress handsomely, according to the occasion and choice of place.
This is very special and it deserves to be "picture perfect".
15 questions you must ask your girlfriend before proposing
If you've just decided to propose to your partner, you're sure to feel nervous and worry about how to do it the "right way. It means you're about to embark upon the next chapter of your lives, so before you get down on one knee, read these dos and don'ts of traditional marriage proposals. Do test the waters : Before you propose, the two of you should have already spoken about getting married. Make sure marriage is something that each of you wants, and make sure you both agree on major issues such as children. You don't want your partner to be taken completely off guard, as a surprise proposal is almost certainly guaranteed to elicit a hesitant "yes," if not an "I'll have to think about it.
For the guy [or babe] who chooses to propose, you must first ask yourself questions to ascertain your own readiness and qualification for such huge step; and then there are questions you have to ask your partner, too. Getting into a marriage, as romantic as it is, is pretty much like a entering into contractual agreement. Before agreeing to a contract, you are logically expected to ask relevant questions; questions which, to a reasonably large extent, clear any doubts you may have. It is called due diligence.
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In the early stages of a relationship, you'll likely want to look your best percent of the time. Once you've settled into a comfortable relationship, you're not afraid to let your partner see you in your ratty sweats or with your night retainer in. A big part of a successful marriage is feeling comfortable discussing all types of subjects with your partner. Arguments and disagreements are a part of even the strongest relationships. If your partner can make even the lamest situations awesome hello, DMV line! A long and healthy marriage is sure to have its ups—and definitely its down. Will your partner stay at his or her current job for a while or plan on switching careers? Will they be traveling often for work? As we all know, having a pet is just like having a child. While you don't have to know every gory detail of your partner's past breakups, it's still important to know about your partner's former relationships and why they ended.
38 Romantic Ways to Propose, According to Real Couples
Engagement season lasts from November to February, but like the diamond on a bad ring, the sting of rejection lasts forever. Here's how to know if it's meant to be. We were, generally, conflict-free. So I immediately said yes. And the moment I accepted, I felt a queasy rush of existential dread wash over me, a sinking feeling that made me want to retch.
Asking for your partner's hand in marriage is one of the biggest moments of your life. Special as it is, surely you want to ensure that this proposal is impressive and unforgettable. In this article we have compiled 18 proposal ideas for an irresistible proposal.
26 Signs You Should Propose ASAP
Updated: January 15, Reader-Approved References. Proposing marriage can be one of the most nerve-wracking and exciting moments of your life. Not surprisingly, you may feel a lot of pressure to get every last detail right. Log in Facebook.
For a lot of men, asking a woman to marry them is one of the scariest things they'll ever have to do. They feel pressure to make the proposal perfect and stressed about what their girlfriend's response will be even if they're fairly certain she'll say "yes. As long as you put in an effort and try to make her feel special, then your proposal should be fine. Her answer will be based on how she feels about you and your relationship. It is likely something she has been thinking about a long time. So if you "mess" it up, her answer is unlikely to change.
How To Propose To A Girl
Alexandra Halliday. Planning a proposal is an extremely personal and emotional event—not to mention a pretty BIG deal. Need a little help? These ideas for how to propose are a great source of reassurance and inspiration for your own engagement moment. Trust us, you've got this! Once you're engaged, you'll want to share your happiness with the whole world! If you recently decided to get married, you can enter WeddingWire's JustSaidYes Contest between now and February 29, for a chance to win prizes and money toward your wedding.
If you care enough about someone to propose marriage , you should choose your words carefully to make them as meaningful as possible to your partner. Don't just ask, "Will you marry me? Your intended is going to remember what you said when you proposed for the rest of your lives together, so make those words count.
How To Propose To Her
Here, relationship experts and therapists give you their best advice on how to approach, plan and consider your game plan for getting on one knee and hoping for forever. Even if she usually goes for modern, chunky, gold costume jewelry with her everyday wear, she might want something more subtle and classic for the ring that symbolizes her commitment to you and building your life together. While in a perfect world, she would love anything you give her, we all have personal taste, and this is something that she will wear and be looking at everyday of her life.
The 66 Most Romantic Ways to Propose
We know how nerve-wracking planning a wedding proposal can be. If all those jitters are making it hard to decide on how to propose, we've got your back. Try putting your own spin on one these romantic and creative proposal ideas.
This article is from the archive of our partner. People, people, people. We realize some of you are very eager to wed one another, and that you want to do it in the right way. You know, by asking in the most visible and obvious fashion that shows the world how much you really do care. This means that something quiet and private and sweet or romantic or special that's just between you and your betrothed-to-be simply will not do.
Asking Her Dad For Permission To Marry Her Is So 1917